34 Weeks 4 days - You're Doing What???

Before I start today's post,  I would like to give a big thank you to my reader, Debbie, for her guest post this week.  If you missed her post and did not have a chance to read it yet, please go to the blog archive and click on the posts for September. Her story is incredibly touching and for those of you who have also experienced infertilty, IVF, or incompetent cervix you will definitely want to read her guest post!  Thank you again Debbie for sharing your story with us! Please keep us posted on your current pregnancy. You are in our thoughts!

I am 34 weeks and 4 days pregnant as of today, Tuesday.  I had my scheduled OB appointment and learned some interesting news that frankly didn't surprise me. My ultrasound showed that my cervix is now at 1.5cm in length and to make matters worse it also showed that my baby has dropped further and his head is now fully pressing on my cervix.  So much so that my doctor decided he needed to an actual exam to make sure that what he saw on the ultrasound was not causing my cervix to open. His findings? He could feel the baby's head and decided that my cerclage had to come out immediately, 2.5 weeks early! This was a surprise. He was adamant last week that the cerclage was not coming out until 37 weeks.  Despite the fact that my contractions have slowed somewhat, I knew something was different today based on the pressure I was feeling in my cervix...

"Your mind knows only some things. Your inner voice, your instinct, knows everything. If you listen to what you know instinctively, it will always lead you down the right path."  Henry Winkler

Despite my exciting day. tonight I am oddly calm. It only took my little boy growing in my tummy to teach me to finally listen to my instincts and trust that whatever happens, happens and will be ok. It's been an exhausting past week full of visits to the hospital in pre-term labor with nothing really working to truly stop my contractions. I could tell that something was different today and my inner voice told me that my baby boy was further readying himself to enter into the world. When my contractions started last week, I felt scared and worried that my child would be born too soon. I suddenly had visions of the NICU from when my daughter was there for 97 painfully emotional days. The doctor reassured me last week that if my baby was born at 34 weeks, it would be light years from 24 weeks and that viability is no longer a factor to be concerned about. Some comfort, but I also know from our previous NICU experience that boys don't do as well as girls. In the NICU, the actually call them "wimpy white boys." It sounds terrible, but that is really what they call male white babies born too soon. No one knows why they don't do as well. I also know from several people that I have talked to, including nurses, that a boy born at 34 weeks will usually spend about 2 weeks in the hospital on oxygen. Not an incredibly long time compared to our previous journey, and it will only likely be oxygen and not intubation so that is a comfort.

My mom helped me get my kiddos ready for school today and my hubby came home on his lunch hour to take the girls to school so I would be able to continue to rest.  My mom also drove me to my appointment and after learning that my cerclage would be removed I was incredibly grateful I had someone there with me to drive me home.  I was scheduled to remove the cerclage in his office in week 37, but I was not prepared to have it removed today and was now bit worried about the pain I was going to experience and worried what would happen if he removed my stitches and I went into full blown labor in his office. He had a student nurse practitioner in his office that came into my appointment and I could tell she was a bit worried too.

First of all, the actual removal of the stitch was not the painful part. He did a couple of snips and removed it rather quickly. However, what hurt the most was the actual exam and the pressing on my cervix. I did start bleeding rather heavily but my OB was able to get the bleeding stopped. I was already having contractions that started when I first got to his office and just prior to removing the cerclage my contractions were getting more pronounced and painful. After he did the exam, removed the cerclage, and did one more check of my cervix I started cramping to the point where it felt like a very intense first day of my period.  Frankly, I was worried.

Just before I left the doctors office, he explained that the cramping was normal as was some bleeding tonight, however if my contractions became more pronounced and painful I am to immediately get myself into the hospital as it is more thank likely labor and my doctor will be moving forward with the c-section. We live about 12-15 minutes away from the hospital where I am to deliver, but I know that it will take about 20-25 minutes total to get there and get up to labor and delivery.

However, despite my initial fears after I left his office, I find myself very calm tonight. I trust that everything will be ok and I don't feel that anything will happen tonight.  I am still experiencing contractions off and on, although my cramps have now almost subsided. I will just be taking it easy and continue to rest. When I get up to go to the bathroom, the pressure from the baby is quite painful and it does start more contractions. So I can't really avoid not going to the bathroom, but am doing everything I can to avoid getting up to walk around for anything else. I'm still on 30mg of Procardia 4 times a day and although it doesn't completely stop the contractions, I do think it helps to slow things down somewhat.

I will keep everyone posted should I have more news. Hoping I can make it through at least another week to help his lungs get a bit stronger.